January 2012
8 posts
How to be good at anything
I’m going to tell you how to be good at any given profession, and then I’m going to watch as you continue to be mediocre at everything. Ahem.
If you wanna be good at business, look at everything that happens in your life and think, “how can I make money from this?”
If you wanna be a good comedian, look at everything that happens to you and ask yourself, “is there...
Shovelling snow is like sex...
My brother posted this:
Earl and I riffed on over IM later, and here’s a bunch more that we came up with. Ahem.
Shovelling snow is like sex…
…no matter how careful I am, my socks still get wet.
…I always need a shower afterwards.
…it’s hard on the wrists if you’re doing it yourself.
…if you marry the right guy you’ll never have to do it...
Hang out on the floor more
My new apartment (which sucks) came with those fake wood floors (which suck.) The fake thing I’m totally cool with, but wood? On the floor? C’mon!!
So to lessen the sting of the hard floor I bought a fluffy rug. Fluffy? Um. Shaggy! (It wasn’t me.) It’s a giant thick rug anyway. I would still prefer wall-to-wall-to-ceiling carpeting, but this rug is sweet. And though not...
Anonymous asked: "Holy monkey balls:" Where and when did you learn this expression, Angus, and who else uses it? Graham.
Anonymous asked: Did Scott Adams ghost-write your last post?
I don't want a great Facebook app, I want a great...
I’m about to tell you what’s wrong with the internet. You might wanna get an adult beverage, cause this is gonna be somethin’. Seriously, years from you’re gonna look back and be like, “well what do you know, that ugly bastard was right.”
Alright, here’s the problem: everyone is making amazing specialized-task apps that everyone can use.
What they should...
Holy monkey balls, I have 50 goals for 2012
Fifty goals! That’s like more goals than have been scored in every football match throughout human history.
To make the list more readable, Imma toss in some weird pictures from 2011 I found while dumping my phone pics this morning.
——-
1. Sit in an orange chair.
2. Do 10 stand-up sets in at least two different venues.
3. Go to a place which I’ve never been, stay at least a...
December 2011
2 posts
Goals for Twenty-Eleven: Revisited
It’s time to recap my goals for 2011 and see how I did.
1. Move out of my apartment.
Done! My subsequent travels may not have worked out and I may hate my new apartment but I sure did move out of my last one. I hope to one day eventually find a place to live that I actually like, but until then it’s good to shake things up.
2. Eat a >250g bag of potato chips in one sitting. And...
WatchHappy whatever-you-call-your-biscuit-eating-happy-days.
November 2011
2 posts
A Weird Night
Okay, so I go out with this girl that I’ve liked for a while, and it was an unmemorable time. But as I’m dropping her off in my Mini, she points out a parking space and invites me in. Sexcellent.
As we enter her apartment, he roommate and a bunch of friends are all hanging around in very casual grey clothes. They said hello awkwardly. The girl I’m out with then says, “I...
September 2011
6 posts
While researching HTML entities and their usage...
…I stumbled upon this in the issue tracker for a Drupal extension:
Here’s the sample image it was talking about:
I dunno what I liked more, that someone cared enough to make a patch just for this, or that the example involved buying a dog online for $2.75.
(And yes, the difference in the characters x and × is something I find interesting. I warned you when you asked to be my...
2 tags
My review of the Sept 2011 Facebook changes
They’re fine, whatever.
Anonymous asked: did you ever make the headboard? I'm gonna hack my tromso today.. You sir .... are a GENIUS!!
Mint.com and RBC -- A white person problem
Mint.com stopped syncing with RBC (my bank) around two weeks ago. I know! But hold on, it gets better.
First, I never realized how much I relied on Mint. I do not spend a damn cent without Mint’s say-so.
After a couple weeks, I was seriously contemplating switching banks, thinking RBC might be trying to block Mint. Then they tweeted...
July 2011
1 post
My review of Mac OS X 10.7 / Lion
It’s fine, whatever.
June 2011
1 post
Anonymous asked: Hi Angus. Nice work. I was wondering how you secured the plastic surround. I did a similar install and the bottom of the plastic keeps shifting outward so it is notmflush with the climate control panel.
Thanks for your help,
Chris
Thanks for your help,
Chris
May 2011
3 posts
“You could try doing more listening and less talking. People like that. But...”
– Scott Adams in another great post. (Anyone who has ever talked to me knows how much I enjoy his blog.) This passage perfectly described the sad truth behind the death of several formerly-great friendships of mine.
3 tags
Installing a new stereo in my 2002 Volvo S60
This weekend I installed a new stereo in my Volvo. I thought I’d post a write-up for those curious about the process. For everyone else, I translated the article into Swedish, then back into English. This is the result. (I’ve bolded my favorite bits.) I begin by saying that the stereo in Volvo sounded good. Really good. By far the best factory stereo in any car I’ve owned. The...
April 2011
3 posts
The First Possibly-Annual Woodman Bros Programming...
Today, Earl, Peter and I are at Earl’s house, programming things on a table. Cause that’s what we do, alright? I’m gonna live-blog it all day. So … follow along?
Update, 1:30pm. I made some Indian food for lunch and burned our faces off. The day continues faceless.
2:30pm. Peter makes two good jokes in the span of a few minutes. Earl and I are speechless.
...
“Dum-de-dum, what a lovely day on the river. The sun is out, the fish are...”
– About a dam, from the water’s point of view
Eff you, dreams!
I hate dreams. Hate, hate, hate ‘em. Thankfully I usually forget about them. This one, however, I still remember days later. I think I’ve identified all the brain-leaks, but who knows. The reasons I think things were part of my dream are in brackets. (The brackets are things about real life, NOT the dream world.) Here we go.
I was shopping for shirts at Club Monaco (I had a friend who...
March 2011
2 posts
We all work in an old bureaucracy, an old...
After Earl asked if I had finished a particular promo piece I was working on:
Comedy Sketch: The Proposal
Should you be wondering why I don’t blog as much or return your phone calls or remember your name, it’s because I’ve been spending a lot of time working on two new projects. They’re taking a lot of work, but I can’t wait to unveil them later this year.
In the meantime, I’m gonna dig up some old things I’ve written to keep you entertained, whatever your...
February 2011
2 posts
My Default Word
Do you have a default word? I thought everyone had one. You know, that word you type when your brain can’t focus on what to type and a blank text box or text file is staring you in the face.
My word is ‘chicken’.
I’ll open a new browser tab and forget where I wanted to go. C-H-I-C-K-E-N-backspace-backspace-backspace-backspace
This usually happens when my brain is turned...
Anonymous asked: What has you so tied up and involved that you haven't posted anything for the month of February?
January 2011
4 posts
Mini Cooper vs. Volvo S60
I’ve had a Volvo S60 for a few months now and that time has overlapped with the end of the lease on my Mini. So a comparison is apt for any potential car buyers and/or people with nothing better to read.
• Size. I thought I liked small cars like the Mini until I drove a big car. The Volvo is so much more comfortable. In the Volvo it’s like I’m floating down the road in a giant...
My 1.5 seconds of obscurity
Because you didn’t catch me on last night’s premiere of Republic of Doyle, here’re some stills. Or you can watch it online — it’s the very first scene. For those brief moments, I had to get up at 6am on a Sunday, fill out a pile of forms, and stand around for five or six hours while trying to resist the temptation to touch Jake’s delicious face. (Which was...
Best of things
It’s best-of music search blog super time again! Last year’s post still holds.
http://angusw.tumblr.com/post/330755402/new-year-new-music-new-underwear
My fav albums of 2010 were actually of 2009, found using this method. Gold!
Also, I can now say I’m firmly a supporter of boxers. Briefs are terrible inventions.
Angry Birds
I’ve been playing a lot of Angry Birds and what I’ve discovered is that it’s basically a metaphor for life. See, the birds are women (see British slang) and the men are the pigs. And the “birds” basically kill themselves trying to destroy the “pigs” cause the birds can’t think about anything but their eggs.
Nailed it!
December 2010
3 posts
Anonymous asked: What's an uggo?
Too long to tweet
While filling my water bottle at the slightly sketchy tap in our slightly sketchy work kitchen, I wondered if the water was clean enough to wash the bottle with. Then I thought, “well, if it’s good enough to put inside you, it’s good enough to do your dishes.” Then I thought that would be good advice for picky women.
Goals for Twenty-Eleven, part one
Move out of my apartment.
Eat a >250g bag of potato chips in one sitting. And no, I’ve never done that before.
Take a (legal) drug.
Watch four movies in one day.
Exercise at least 50 times. For it to count, it must be uncomfortable and require a shower afterwards. (And not be sex.) Must be tracked through some sort of computerized file.
November 2010
10 posts
Anonymous asked: okay sounds reasonable. I've been here for a while (NFLD) and find it hard to meet people *sigh*
Thanks!
Thanks!
Anonymous asked: where do you meet the people you date?
WatchDucks on the Lake. Because ducks are such peaceful creatures.
The new car green light
A while back I posted about getting a new car and that I had enlisted my brother to pick it out. (TL;DR: I’m giving my brother Earl a pile of money, and he’s buying my next car before I even see it.)
Last week I gave him the green light to buy me a car. The only difference was the budget. Because of life things, I decided I didn’t want to finance another car right now, so I told...
White Bored 4: The Cubicles
Previous posts: the boat, the chicken and the duck, the cottage.
Monday
Monday was the tree-drawing co-worker’s last day, so I drew a pair of cubicles to make a last-day joke as a send off.
Ugh, that was no good. No wonder she left.
Tuesday
My officemate was confused. She had not seen the movie. I was confused cause I was re-using jokes I thought of months prior and deemed too...
Goals for 2010, revisited
So last year I posted a bunch of goals that I set for 2010. I checked ‘em over and nothing will change between now and the end of the year, so let’s go through ‘em and discuss, in order of success to failure.
2. Eat a muffin
Done, done, done and done! So many times done.
5. Gain 5kgs
Ohmigod, I actually did this! And it wasn’t all the muffins I ate. I thought I had...
White Bored 3: The Cottage
When at work and the code is gettin’ me down, I take to the white board. Sometimes what comes out clarifies my work. Though sometimes it’s a conversation on a boat,or a conversation between a chicken and a duck or, like this week, a conversation in a cottage.
Monday
Things started off with a simple cottage.
Tuesday
The cottage was alright, but it was in need of roof repairs.
...
Bruno Mars - Marry You
Bruno Mars is out of...
WatchMy latest video. I don’t even know what to say about it.
October 2010
20 posts
Jimmy Fallon is following me on Twitter
This morning I finally became cooler than you because, as the title says, Jimmy Fallon started following me on Twitter.
Proof, you say? Bam!
Now, granted, he does follow a couple thousand people, but he’s followed by almost three million! For those who like math, that puts me in the top 0.08% (Assuming everyone he follows also follows him, that is.) For those who don’t like math, it...
White Bored 2: Duck and Chicken
When I’m at work and a particular piece of code is getting me down, I take to the white board and draw out my thoughts. Sometimes what comes out on the board helps clarify my work, sometimes it’s a conversation on a boat, and sometimes it’s a conversation between a chicken and a duck.
Friday
It started off a little subtle.
I really liked this first one, but it was also the one that...
Robyn - Fembot
Robyn’s Albums Body Talk...