Jimmy Fallon is following me on Twitter
This morning I finally became cooler than you because, as the title says, Jimmy Fallon started following me on Twitter.
Proof, you say? Bam!
Now, granted, he does follow a couple thousand people, but he’s followed by almost three million! For those who like math, that puts me in the top 0.08% (Assuming everyone he follows also follows him, that is.) For those who don’t like math, it means I am super awesome cool chill brah!
I wonder if Mr Fallon (I’ll wait until we’ve met in person to call him Jimmy or, dear I dream, J-Town) actually handles his own Twitter. It’s quite possible he has an assistant to help him handle it. Imagine meeting that girl at a party. “So what do you do?” “I’m Jimmy Fallon’s tweeter.”
Yep.
But for now I’m going to assume it’s him. And it was at the hand of Jimmy that I was elevated to new levels of coolness.
“So what,” you ask selfishly, “how does this affect me?”
Well, I’ll tell you. If we are friends, enjoy it while it lasts. Now that I’m part of the elite, our friendship will probably dissolve. I wish it didn’t have to be that way, but before long I will be swept up in a whirlwind of excitement and celebrity that will be fun for a while, but will eventually spit me out the other side as a friendless, angry drunk.
It’s unfortunate, I know. But such is life. And I wish you the best with yours as you move on without me.
To end, I would like to thank my parents for always believing in me. And of course, I would like to thank God. I know I don’t technically believe in you, but from here on out I am going to have to pretend. For my career.
For those unfamiliar with Jimmy Fallon’s awesomeness, please see the latest Head Swap. (I would encourage you to seek out the first five as well you haven’t seen them.) Also, you can follow my new friend on Twitter, here.
